Wednesday, October 29, 2008

no news is good news?

randy seems to think so. me, personally... i think it sucks. sorry.
i guess whatever this particular cancer is, or should i say "tumor", since they are now hopeful that there's still a slight chance that it's benign, ( i REALLY hope so), but am tired of having the rug pulled out from under me, so i will stay neutral, is too rare to understand, so they sent it to harvard to decipher. that was a long sentence. anyways, we have to wait a few more days. if it means it comes back as not being cancer, i will wait the rest of my lifetime. this waiting game is killing me. i still feel so blessed to have everyone rallying around us.

as i said a few days ago, the raw nerves would enter in, and they have. i feel like i can cry at the drop of a hat. i think a lot of it is sleep deprivation. there's so much going on other than this and it's getting hard to keep up. plus... i feel like a wienie. on sunday, we took his dressings off, i have pictures i will post as soon as i find my camera again. but it really shocked me how big and gnarly they were, and i felt a little sick. i think my helper was a little shocked too. so we put new bandages on, and i thought it was just shock that made me feel that way. NOPE. last night i had to keep leaving the room so i wouldn't throw up. it must be because i love him so much that it REALLY bothers me. i usually have a strong stomach for these things. oh well, maybe i'm slipping in my old age...

1 comment:

Vonnie said...

Randy and Kristyn, we are earnestly praying for you. We will fight fervently on your behalf, asking the Holy Spirit to lift up a standard against the enemy, who seeks to rob us of our joy and peace. We are boldly asking the Lord for healing for Randy and God's amazing peace and comfort for your whole family.
Standing in the gap...
Vonnie Dodson (from NCR and Simpson)

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